Also people really don’t understand the distinction between defending your friends and standing up for them. Today I was talking to one of my friends while her team mates were around and on two occasions one of them randomly lashed out at me in a frankly rude and just random manner. And I brought this up to her and she was clearly getting annoyed with me for saying most of the team is like that and there’s a reason they have a bad reputation. But here’s the thing: they do. It’s an undeniable fact around campus that her sport is the party asshole sport that goes too hard and are jerks. But that’s okay.
In high school two of my friends were probably the cattiest and straight up rude people I know. It was almost always justified, or truthful but they didn’t take shit and dealt out to people what was coming. So when people would come up to me and be like “yeah, I was talking to him and he said this” I’d just shrug and go “oh yeah, that’s him” I wasn’t going to get defensive over it. why? because he’s like that! and while it’s not a great thing it’s how he is and everyone knows it and I’m not gonna bullshit and say it isn’t. he doesn’t give a fuck and I don’t the rude team mate gave a fuck what I thought about her. you can acknowledge people you like’s faults without have to defend why they have them.
my friends were generally rude to people. but I found it funny and it was why we got along. If you ask me I’ll always say it’s what they are and people who can’t accept having people they like being spoken of in any way less than exemplary on grounds of “oh you don’t really know them” are be over sensitive jerk. (also in here in the distinction between calling out on shit, and insulting people/the whole “only I can pick on my little brother” relationship)
